Thursday, March 31, 2011

Shiney moves into tears, gets seven years jail


Bollywood actor Shiney Ahuja’s rape case has been resolved. The case which was running at the fast track court since 2009 was finally out. The actor who was on bail was arrested and taken to jail. He was proved guilty of raping his maid servant at his apartment.


Shiney fought for two years but finally the decision of the court went against him. He was found guilty of raping his maid servant. He was seen outside the court in pink shirt with wife Anupam. After the incident, the girl lodged a complaint at the police station against the actor, cops arrested Ahuja from his apartment. There were many ups and downs in the case, sometimes Shiney comes out clear and sometimes the girl was proved right.


The case was later moved to the fast track court for quick judgment. Finally, the DNA test, the girl’s torn hymen and Ahuja's and the maid's torn clothes clearly indicates that Shiney was guilty.


The police, in a 109-page charge sheet, accused Ahuja of raping his maid. An eyewitness said that Shiney broke down after the court verdict but he can appeal in the High Court.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Karan Johar to tie the knot with a family friend


It is hard to believe but that the man who always runs away from marriage and marriage related question has finally decided to settle down. Bollywood’s one of the most eligible bachelors, filmmaker Karan Johar is going to tie the knot. Now the million dollar question is who the lucky person is. She is New York based and a daughter of family friend, named Vandana Melwani.  


It is reported that Kjo has revealed the news to a Dubai based Bollywood tabloid. The reason behind Karan’s frequent visit to New York is 31yr old Vandana. They have been dating for almost a year now and the duo has decided to settle down.


1st April is very near and we wonder was it is a biggest joke of the year.

Monday, March 28, 2011

Keep Calm, Move Along


The one thing one should ALWAYS keep in mind when flying to Orlando is to never, ever fly to Orlando. EVER.

Yes, our pilot was totally hot (no, I did not pull a Liz Lemon and stage a mutiny – but I was THIS close), and my exit row seat provided me three more glorious inches than usual, but the entire plane, the ENTIRE PLANE was full to the brim with prepubescent bundles of absolute terror all jumping in their seats in expectation for Disney World. I don’t think I have ever experienced as much hate towards Mickey Mouse as I did for those last four hours.

http://sirmitchell.tumblr.com/ - Check him, yo.

And you know what? I was totally fine with that. Peachy, in fact. They were strapped in – what possible harm, apart from a little seat-kicking, could they get up to? No, it was the parents I worried about. And I was right to worry. OH, was I right.

The entirety of our flight was narrated by a born-and-raised Rhode Island woman who punctuated her furious texting with an occasional gum smack and a running commentary of EVERYTHING that was happening out the window AT ALL times. After a particularly bumpy bout of turbulence, said woman literally repeated at LEAST once every five minutes that “it was like the ground fell out from under me,” to which I almost snarkily replied that it had, indeed, fallen out from under her upon take-off. Also, that amazingly the rest of had us felt the same thing she did, and did not need her to re-remind us that we were traveling at high speeds in a small, enclosed container, in mid-air with HER.

Artistic rendition of this woman. And by artistic, I mean this is a picture of Snooki. Use your imagination.

Her main concern, apart from making sure we all knew the blow-by-blow of her titillating plane experience, was the lack of sunshine in Orlando needed to “get her tan on,” and regulating her young child’s music selection. This is how, after I had finally managed to get some sleep, I was lulled awake by the dulcet tones of “I’m a Slave 4 U” (spelling: Britney can has it?).

An approximation of my hair at this point in the story


Okay, guys, I admit – I love Britney as much as the next ‘90s child. Yet there is something that is fundamentally wrong to me about playing this music, sans headphones, on a four-hour plane full of children under the age of ten. I dunno, that’s just my opinion on the matter.

Another of my opinions got me in a little more trouble, as the plane was coasting to a stop and “I’m a Slave 4” My Tan STANDS UP while the plane is STILL MOVING, yanks her kid up, and is confused as to why the entire row in front of her, in unison, tell her to “SIT (the f***k) DOWN.” Not to be deterred, this woman has the nerve to bad-talk me as I grab my bag from the overhead compartment and get off in front of her, despite actually BEING in front of her. In fact, she attempts to pretend I have hit her child. 

Meth is like parenthood: it does things to people. Specifically, it does Steve Buscemi to people.

Lady, I am this close to hitting something else. Just try me.

Moral of the story? Avoid children on planes. Because, and you’ll know this if you’ve ever been to a kiddie soccer game, the higher the parent to square foot ratio is, the more inexplicably ridiculous the insanity becomes.You just gotta:

OHAI, I like Star Wars. OMFG Star Wars. ALL day ERRY day.



Kelly Brook | Sexy Wallpapers Showing Breast







Kelly Brook | Sexiest Hollywood Actress







Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Katrina wants to be back in Salman’s life

Katrina Kaif again wants Salman Khan back in her life and this is all for career progress. Usually, Salman Khan woos her and persuades her to come back to him but now the table turned down. This time it is Kat who is going crazy to get back Sallu. The reason is totally professional, the actress again wants the actor’s help for smooth running of her career.


Katrina is Kabir Khan’s favorite. She starred in his film ‘New York’ and now Kabir Khan will direct Salman Khan first time for a Yash Raj films. Kat is already in the good books of Kabir Khan and Yash Raj and now she has to convince her ex beau only.


It is heard that Katrina is getting back to Salman’s family and almost irritating them to have a talk with Salman about the film. They are already angry with the actress and now her latest move is frustrating them to no end.

Monday, March 21, 2011

Star Destroyer? I Hardly Know Her!


There was a lot of judgmental badger face happening this weekend. Mostly on my face. Mostly due to the Star Wars Holiday Special. Caveat: you may not have heard of it. Because George Lucas attempted to find and destroy all remaining copies. It's that bad.

Badger, badger, badger, badger. MUSHROOM.
I’d like to compare the opening ten minutes of this atrocity to the first thirty minutes of 2001: A Space Odyssey, as they both involve large expanses of time in which large, furry mammals talk to each other sans subtitles, and I couldn’t really give a shit. The nice part about 2001 is that halfway through we get a break from the weird prehistoric trip. Star Wars Holiday Special? Not so kind.
I’m going to skip over most of it, as I choose to do of my middle school years, because it is honestly too awful for simple summary. All I am going to say are that the highlights include the musical talents (in descending order) of Jefferson Starship, Carrie Fischer and this crazy-ass lady:

Please appreciate that I got this from the website www.toplessrobot.com

It pains me to say it, but the best part of the whole thing was the animated sequence with Bobba Fett. He appears, fittingly, riding on top of a gigantic dinosaur. I’m going to let that mull over a little bit in your mind while I make jokes about how much coke Carrie Fischer and gang did in the ‘80s and how George Lucas’s body “Fett”  (yeah, I went there) has increased significantly after the passage of such a noble decade. Coincidence? I think not.

Also, observe this artistic rendition of Han Solo and just TRY to tell me there wasn’t something else going on there:
It disturbs me how happy they are with their tiny cartoon lives.

Crack is wack guys. That said, if they had gotten Whitney Houston to sing their original song, I don’t think they’d be in this mess in the first place.

I may have actually had a separate, unrelated discussion about the theoretical sign for carbonite this weekend, but I’m not a total Star Wars nerd, you guys, I promise.

To prove it, last night I also watched, in quick succession, Swan Princess, Land Before Time, AND Anastasia. Admittedly, that sounded much more impressive, and less immature in my head.

For a minute, put aside the fact that I have the maturity level of a thirteen year old boy of questionable sexuality. Believe me when I say that Land Before Time really does stand the test of time. I can definitely see why my mother was more positive toward me watching that movie over and over as opposed to my other cinematically genius choices (Princess Diaries, Fern Gully, Swan Princess II, etc.). Also, baby dinosaurs are far superior to baby humans. Uncontested fact.

Why was Robin Williams even in this movie?

In more serious, world news, here’s  a picture of an old Japanese man being rescued from Tsunami/Earth Shake (yeaaaah, Land Before Time jargon):

Rescue Efforts: Japan Does them Cuter
Donate to Japan if you ever want your iPad 2 to ship. And also if you generally consider yourself capable of empathy.